Day 71 (September 1): Poop, Pee and People
Sorry, folks, there will be no pictures with this entry.
It's Sunday morning at the cabin/cottage we've rented on Mount Desert Island on the coast of Maine and Ali, recently age 6, interprets her Aunt Suzanne's declaration of, "I'm going to go take a shower" as an invitation.
A while later, after Suzanne has stopped laughing and regained the ability to breathe, she recounts this little gem. This nugget. This brilliant little vignette that perfectly illustrates not only Ali's total lack of boundaries but her totally-unbiased inquisitive personality and view of the world.
This is also fair warning to everybody else who might ever express an intent to shower in Ali's vicinity.
According to Suzanne, Ali spent the shower taking full inventory of her (Suzanne's) body parts. In particular, Ali was confused why Suzanne didn't have a lateral scar on her lower abdomen as Elise does (as the reward for having three c-sections while delivering Lily (8 pounds, 10 ounces), Henry (11 pounds), and the twins (12.5 pounds, combined).
"Simple," Suzanne explained, "I didn't have a c-section to give birth to your cousin Claire."
"Then how did she get out of your body?"
"My body has three holes. One for pee, one for poop and one for people."
The answer confused Ali, who knew she had holes for the production of pee and poop but didn't know there was also a hole for people. She had a few follow up questions, which generally revealed that she has a funny idea about how large (and functional) babies are when they are born. Maybe we've watched Secretariat too many times, which emphasizes the fact that the wonder horse stood up immediately after birth.
I have to give credit to Suzanne, who stood there in the shower with Ali answering all of her questions, and then who reported on the exchange. I also need to remember that Ali's curiosity and Suzanne's candor are perfectly matched. Also, the alliteration is entirely to Suzanne's credit, who gave me permission to report on the episode.
I really hope this is one of those stories somebody remembers to tell at Ali's wedding (or whatever suitably embarrassing moments present themselves).
It's Sunday morning at the cabin/cottage we've rented on Mount Desert Island on the coast of Maine and Ali, recently age 6, interprets her Aunt Suzanne's declaration of, "I'm going to go take a shower" as an invitation.
A while later, after Suzanne has stopped laughing and regained the ability to breathe, she recounts this little gem. This nugget. This brilliant little vignette that perfectly illustrates not only Ali's total lack of boundaries but her totally-unbiased inquisitive personality and view of the world.
This is also fair warning to everybody else who might ever express an intent to shower in Ali's vicinity.
According to Suzanne, Ali spent the shower taking full inventory of her (Suzanne's) body parts. In particular, Ali was confused why Suzanne didn't have a lateral scar on her lower abdomen as Elise does (as the reward for having three c-sections while delivering Lily (8 pounds, 10 ounces), Henry (11 pounds), and the twins (12.5 pounds, combined).
"Simple," Suzanne explained, "I didn't have a c-section to give birth to your cousin Claire."
"Then how did she get out of your body?"
"My body has three holes. One for pee, one for poop and one for people."
The answer confused Ali, who knew she had holes for the production of pee and poop but didn't know there was also a hole for people. She had a few follow up questions, which generally revealed that she has a funny idea about how large (and functional) babies are when they are born. Maybe we've watched Secretariat too many times, which emphasizes the fact that the wonder horse stood up immediately after birth.
I have to give credit to Suzanne, who stood there in the shower with Ali answering all of her questions, and then who reported on the exchange. I also need to remember that Ali's curiosity and Suzanne's candor are perfectly matched. Also, the alliteration is entirely to Suzanne's credit, who gave me permission to report on the episode.
I really hope this is one of those stories somebody remembers to tell at Ali's wedding (or whatever suitably embarrassing moments present themselves).
KUDOS Suzanne! And yes, watch out for future renditions of this tale, Ali!
ReplyDeleteIt's cute how you thought the kids would need a formal homeschool curriculum
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